Lies

She wasn't even real.

A quick update

I'm working on this thesis thing. It's kinda tricky. But here is a quick video of David Lynch reviewing the iPhone. Enjoy.

Salute the `gong!

Today happened to be a great day. You see, I'm down in the `gong (Wollongong) at the moment, soaking up the occasional ray when I can catch it, in between 12 hours of back-to-back science lectures and physics seminars. It's quite a nice international conference, the lunches have been outstanding. A barrel full of oysters and prawns every day, along with prawn salads, fresh crabs and octopus. I never got a chance to touch the Barra or steak or pork. Incredible.

And today I sat down with Mr. M (he wants privacy, go figure) for lunch, and Alain Aspect and Bill Phillips sat down at our table with us (Bill got the Nobel prize in 97). There were a couple of other important scientist, and we all discussed what is meant by a "slow" train in France, England, American and Australia. Then I went for a swim. Awesome.

I must say, I have had THE BEST calimari that I've ever had in my entire life down here in the Gong. Outstanding. I'm going back for more tonight. Yum.

Best books ever

In perusing the New York Time's 10 Best Books of 2007 I decided to have a little fun. Here are the first five. Only the titles have been changed. I found the book descriptions ridiculous, so I left them as is. Try to imagine what the real title actually is. Then click and find out. Click on the title-links to see the real reviews.

A MAN GOES DOWN AND WAITS IN A SOCIAL SECURITY LINE
By Michael Thomas. Black Cat/Grove/Atlantic, paper, $14. This first novel explores the fragmented personal histories behind four desperate days in a black writer’s life.

OUT OF THE FRYING PAN...
By Per Petterson. Translated by Anne Born. Graywolf Press, $22. In this short yet spacious Norwegian novel, an Oslo professional hopes to cure his loneliness with a plunge into solitude.

THE WILD APES IN DYMOCKS
By Roberto Bolaño. Translated by Natasha Wimmer. Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $27. A craftily autobiographical novel about a band of literary guerrillas.

REALITY T.V. PRESENTS RICKY GERVAIS
By Joshua Ferris. Little, Brown & Company, $23.99. Layoff notices fly in Ferris’s acidly funny first novel, set in a white-collar office in the wake of the dot-com debacle.

CHRIST, THERE'S CHARLIE! WELL, CHARLIE, MEET CHRIST!
By Denis Johnson. Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $27. The author of “Jesus’ Son” offers a soulful novel about the travails of a large cast of characters during the Vietnam War.

Where does all this impatience come from? Tellmetellmetellme

Perhaps there is reason to believe I won't make the best parent when I grow up. It's some thing to do with this impatience complex I have. I'm am currently in training to cool myself down a little. Chill-lax, as my flatmate would say.

Hence the tea room conversation need to go from this...to this...

Sheer brilliance.

Ok, so I read this a while ago, but, my god, Stephen Colbert is fantastic. Pour yourself a Dirty Cosmotinijito and settle into this brief show of humour.

Best science

I have got nothing for lunch. And I am hungry. Although hunger sharpens my sense, making me edgy, and nervous with energy, ready to pounce. And I crouch on my chair, sitting on my heels, making skittish eye movements as I tap away on my laptop.

And that's when I do my best science.

Reclaiming the space

So, it's been a month since I last threw a post up here. There's been quite a few kilometers in the water, finished a book or two, seen a few flicks. Let's cover a few things of interest here...

Finished Tom Robbin's Villa Incognito.


Quite a good read, contains a lovely summary of the beauty of mayonnaise.

And saw a great flick called Nothing, directed by the guy who did Cube. Had an interesting take on many things. I particularly enjoyed a scene where the protagonists were able to eliminate thoughts and memories, like anger. It reminded me of those who have a sweet spot for chemical "blindfolds", who enjoy the sensation of clearing the mind of everything except the now. The pleasant now. Ignoring the yucky bits in life.

Strange

Ok. So I went to the pool today, and I've swum 2.3km. In the last month.

I'd like to highlight the danger of alcohol for someone who also has some really strange sleeping patterns. Allow me the chart the progression.

1. Drinking on Saturday afternoon. Empty stomach, warm sun, few beers.
   
2. Suddenly feeling very tired, and going home to sleep.
3. Waking up at 11:30pm on a Saturday night with nothing to do. And knowing you won't sleep again till 2pm tomorrow afternoon.

Ach. This will drive me nuts. Though, alternatively, I could go and get some more actual science done.

This evening, I enclose an (unsent) letter I wrote a few minutes ago. You see, I woke up, opened up my laptop, and saw a really funny comic that reminded me of an estranged ex. (Don't worry people, it's an old old ex.) In my strange delirium state I decided to send it to them via Facebooks.

After a few seconds consideration (which always occurs after one has pressed the SEND button), I decided to bash out a quick explanation letter, to keep on hand just in case this correspondence was undesired. I pro-actively prepare for everything these days...

I hope you take that in good faith. I mean, there's alotta water under the bridge (where is the bridge? how old is it? who built it anyway?), and that sort of innocuous and harmless humour can be either appreciated or disregarded. Yet, I wouldn't put it past anyone, anyone, to really get over what they've felt. I mean, do feelings just whither and die? I don't think so. They just become less and less relevant to the immediate world one lives in: to the point where one (arbitrarily) decides one day that they're not important anymore.

So, given that this monologue is written in the off chance that you are, in any way, still angry with me, I wish you all the best. And I'll endeavor to maintain that respectful distance that is most keenly sort out. The distance between happiness and reality.

[update]

The above letter does seem a little... harsh. Hehe, here's hoping I don't have to send it.

Sex, power and vendettas

So I just finished reading Helen Garner's the first stone, and it wasn't a bad read. I preferred Joe Cinque's Consolation, yet this gave me a lot more to think about.

I work in an engineering department. One of the last bastion's of traditionally male fields. And I also work there as a tutor, which brings me into contact with the new generation of engineers. It's wonderful to see more women coming into the area.

But the whole conversation about power and sex (and gender, in my case) isn't well addressed in my work place. It would be nice to see a discourse arise. And hopefully it doesn't come about in such an extreme way as what happened in Ormond.

I also saw V for Vendetta tonight. Was it about democracy? About protesting against the government? Is it related to the Chaser's actions at APEC? These things will need to be discussed at the pub tomorrow. God bless Fridays.

Sum-times

It's times for maths!

Just kidding, I'm not going to inundate you with possibly the most boring subject in the world. I just thought the title was snappy.

And here is a comic.



















Nothing else doing in the world of Stu. Stay tuned for further updates, containing roughly the same amount of useless information.

Cheers.

P.S. Some may notice that his graph isn't even a normal distribution. It kinda looks more Poisson to me. That just makes it sooo much funnier.

What a mistake

In my last post I discussed science using a graph. And, as with all science, I need to note a correction. Originally I said some about "left-to-right" when I really meant "right-to-left", and vice versa. Ok, so I screwed up. I've made the corrections. Sorry to all those amateur science buffs.

Somebody should call Mediawatch and get me on as "Dog of the Week".